We want to have two, others may not even have one

Assalamualaikum

Hello dearest! Its almost midnight now and I dont even feel sleepy. And dont even feel like sleeping. I'm feeling fresh! But like forever, tomorrow I'll be regretting for not sleep early and unfortunately repeat it again the next day. Well, I think thats what we called youth. Actually I'm waiting for my cup cake in the oven to cooked. Yes I'm making cup cake at night. I mean..midnight...Hahhhh. 

Have you ever feel like you're not as good as other people around you? Not as rich as them? Not as beautiful as them? Emm..not as clever as her? Not getting APC(anugerah pelajar cemerlang) though you guys are actually studying together? hahaha..ouchhh right? Not denying that we often compare ourselves with others. "Kalau lah aku pandai macam dia".."kalau lah aku kaya".."kan bagus kalau aku study sanaa bukan sinii".. 

Of course, I'm not pointing to others. Cos this is what happened to me also sometimes. Honestly, once I did ask my dad to change a new car. Because I think I've been driving my car for almost three years now and should give it a try to other different cars. Different brand i mean. My mom offered me a new saga. I was like, lol. And my dad offered Myvi or Viva. I refused cos I wanted a bigger car than mine. So I did my finding on cars. Toyota, Nissan, Suzuki, Proton and Perodua. Mercedes? Ohh that is far beyond my expectation hahaha. But then for some reason it didn't happened. So I went like, well maybe some other time. 

When driving, I always look at cars behind, in front and next to my car. I will go like, how good would it be if I own that car! Yet I'm still taking care of my car though, cos my mom has warned me that if my car is broken because of my carelessness, i wont be able to drive my own car again. Mom go like 'just take a bus and walk to your class'. Of course I feel insecure hahaha. So I take care of it. At the same time, I always thought that my car is still lacking in accessories and etc. 

So this evening, I went to a shop. I brought along my 8 year old girl and 6 year old boy cousins, and their friend, aged 5. My 6 year old and his friend sat at the back. I firstly heard them whispering but I ignored. Ehh wait, am I overused English? Ok mari kita cakap bahasa melayu..bahasa sabah pun boleh... bila aku dengar diorang bisik-bisik, aku buat dont know lah kan time tu. Aku sebagai kakak mana boleh kisah sangat hal budak-budak ni. Nanti ketara sangat xda hal penting mau fikir sebab sebok hal busak. Harus lah jaga pride. Konon. 

Tidak lama lepas tu cousin aku yang 6 tahun ni cakap " kak nana, dia cakap kereta ni cantikkk". When I heard that aku langsung x rasa bangga atau gembira. Suddenly I feel like punched right on my face. Aku mula fikir balik betapa sebelum ni aku merungut sebab kereta ni bermasalah lah, kuat makan minyak lah, cat dah x cantik lah. Sedangkan ada insan-insan yang jarang naik kereta. Ada keluarga yang share satu motor untuk diguna. Allah! Pelupanya manusia ni. Lupa mau bersyukur. 

Samalah juga kalau masa makan. Lepas balik sekolah masuk dapur buka periuk, "alaa ni jaa?". Pergi restoran order nasi goreng lalap, "ish x sedap langsung". Habis orang di Syria ntah makan entah tidak tu, rasanya diorang x merungut pun. Kalau kita bersyukur, rasanya nasi lalap tu jadi jauh lebih sedap kan? Sebab kalau kita lah yang berada di Syria sekarang, nasi kosong x berlauk pun jadi sedap sangattt. 

Terpancung aku dengan kata-kata ikhlas seorang budak. Sucinya hati budak-budak ni. Sebab tu orang kata, budak-budak adalah seperti kain putih. Warna apa yang ibu bapa berikan, warna itulah yang mereka akan kembangkan. Dan aku yakin, semua ni terjadi sebab Allah sudah aturkan. X sangka aku boleh belajar erti bersyukur dari budak berumur 5 tahun. Ahhh hebat rancangan Allah! Subhanallah. 

Ouhh by the way, chocolate butter cup cake aku sudah siap! Tapi maaf la, x dapat bagi sebab buat 1 adunan ja. Dapat buat 30 cup tu pun confirm esok pagi habis mehehe. Ok lah jam 12.45 sekarang, mata mulai terasa berat. Semoga kita beroleh berkat dari Allah sentiasa. Sebab tiada tujuan lain kita di dunia selain mencari redha Ilahi. Subhanallah Walhamdulillah Walailahaillallah Wallahuakbar..=) 

Thank you for reading!